I'm roastin, roastin, toastin
Sitting here on my shooglie chair
Beside my bed
The window's open and blinds aflutter.
And I'm wonderin' there are
Thoughts in my mind that need to be said.

My Highland Spring water bottle is at hand
I'll just give my mum a call
And not stick my head In the sand.
My days are spent asleep or in a trance
I hear"Human" on the radio and wish I could get up and dance.

I awoke the other day and saw Rev Kev
At the bottom of my bed.
Need to share a reading in Joshua that's going around my head.
Edmond has brought his bible today of all days
Maybe it's because it's Sunday?
Kev speaks of a journey lasting 3 days
But, I think I mentioned the wrong verse.
Should've been about determination, confidence,
And not to be afraid or discouraged.
But, yes I know now this is day 1 of the end.

My beautiful children are staying with me
Over night, watching over me, talking with me
I haven't eaten or drank for some time now
So it's difficult to communicate all the love I have to show
Wet sponges on my lips,
and water- just little sips.

It is day 3 now, or was, on this sojourn
My eyes are closing, my mouth is dry
My body shakes, from my bones and soul I'm bourne.
No time to cry, or wonder why.

Do not pine for me too long
Just remember me in the words of the song
"So let me go, life will get better
Find the love I never gave you
Fly high and let me go".

A room full of sadness
A broken heart
And only me to blame
For every single part
No Science or Religion
Could make this whole
To be loved, but never loved
To have, but never hold
It’s a life alone, and a desperate need
To be held to be loved so
This is gonna take a bit of getting used to,
But I know what’s right for you.

WATCH OVER ME
I had nothing but
Time for you
Nothing.
Somewhere in the middle of my doom and your optimism.
We shared a wonderful romance.
You were the " cup half full", positive icon
That I needed to be with
For the rest of my
Life.
Life
With you and our babies
Having fun, parties, holidays
All arranged by you
My love
my Honey.

Missing you is easy
I just look in the mirror and
You are not there.

Loneliness is a heartbreaker
Wishing my life away
So that I can be with
You soon if you
Still want me?

Your voice was so soft
And sensuous like
Your lips and tongue.
Kisses are extinct these days
Except sloppy ones from Parker.

Where did you go to my honey
On the 21st May?
A magic place where no-ones ever been?
Maybe some day you will once again be my queen?

Questions questions I should have
Asked before.
No answers
So I will just get on with it
And see if I can find the door
To open and walk through
To once once again retrieve
A life.
With some one to watch over me.
Goodnight my honey, sweet dreams xx

Apart from you I had nothing
Now you're gone I have even less than.
You showed us and stood by us
When we doubted and had a need for a friend
We followed you till the end
All along the highways and byways and around each bend.
We can hear you speak
We just need to close our eyes
And you are near.
We watched and waited till you drew your last breath
Your words were powerful to the finish.
Many came to see you
No doubt they could not believe what they were hearing.
They brought special things and were dressed in their Sunday best.
In the three days that followed
Your were quiet and sad
You carried your burdens with no help from the bad.
Still, breaking the silence, your voice a whisper
We're hushed and encouraged to be strong and determined,
And to be confident as
You will be with us forever to the last.
What did we do to merit a love so precious and ardent?
And your faith with us is sent
Each day we open our eyes in the morning light,
Until we close them and shut
away the darkness of the night.
Your disciples, your children, were by your side these long days
We paid homage that cost us nothing.
We knew that heaven was waiting within .

16042019

You had me from the moment you said "can you pass me some cutlery" and I replied "Scuse the fingers".
Who's have known all the Moments & Memories that we would share in our journey on this Earth xx.

Here's to the ones that we got
Cheers to the wish you were here, but you're not
'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
Of everything we've been through
Toast to the ones here today
Toast to the ones that we lost on the way
'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
And the memories bring back, memories bring back you xx

STEPS & STONES
I am here to follow in your steps
Along the road that you walked
On your final journey on the stones
That you and I passed in our travels
In our life together.
The people who came to praise your name
All have been on the journey seeking your fame
But where is the love you said was mine?
I bowed each day and asked for a sign.
I know you said life's  a hard road
And the steps up to success were narrow and cold.
The steps down to where I am today
Are strewn with cracks and deep dismay. As I look to where we once were I see your shadow
On the stones I walked with you but no me beside you now.
Yes I followed my leader this way and that But my faith is now lost as I dropped my map
That showed the turns to take.
You were my satnav, my pathfinder
Your eyes  and voice lit up and told
Us all where to find love and be kinder
To the strangers we met along the road. Now alone we must find our own way Make up our own minds and find answers To our prayers each and every day
Please let your soul stay with us?

Sometimes we have to break free.
Love's not always what we want it to be.

Carol I'm missing you very much on this day we met 3/12/1971.
Edmond

I HEARD YOU CALL
I heard you call my name
I had to think Who is there?
I haven't heard it in such a long time
I was brought back into NOW on hearing you care.

Others have walked on by
Even though they had seen me
From Far or nearby
They just said "Hi" or raised an eyebrow
Guesses they didn't see or "hear" my "speak to me" plea.

Oh, now I realise it how I appear
It's the stern look on my face
The sullen frown with no cheer?
My cheery smile, there was no trace.

"It doesn't cost anything to smile Edmond "
My love often said with a sigh
Even to "Wallace" at work I would respond
Maybe I'm not the smiley face type of guy.

Who'd have thought Carol's Obituary page
Could lead to making a new friend
New words and thoughts I have to engage
Sharing a circumstance where our hearts did rend.

So don't let the sharing cease
Until the next time we bump into each other
Maybe we'll get together and write a masterpiece
A book of poems, with our picture on the cover?
EDMOND Wed Nov 07/18