Well mam. here I am again. messaging you. it's my way of telling you how I feel. We are going into 2022 in a few hours and I wish you were here to go into it with. I will be at yours at 12 so I know you will be there in spirit. miss you so much mam. I dread going into another year without you it breaks my heart. I love you so much. hope you and dad are ok up there .happy heavenly new year love and miss you always. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx❤❤❤❤❤❤

Well mam. Its nearly xmas eve. Doesn't seem a year since I was writing to you wishing you a merry xmas. you had only been gone four weeks then .Now its a year and four weeks and its not getting any easier .we are still doing what we did last year .andys cooking john a turkey and iv bought presents off you for john. I'm coming up to your resting place tomorrow with your xmas flowers as me and Lynne is at work xmas day. I'm worrying about john thinking of him opening his presents on xmas morning by himself is making me ill. I know you and dad will be there in spirit but its not the same. Christmas just isn't the same now your not here .Its awful not buying you presents .iv put a tree up your resting place and little ornaments but id rather be giving you presents than flowers .Your just a massive miss mam. life will never ever be the same. I miss my best friend by beautiful mam. someone who has always been there for me and the kids. now your not here breaks my heart so so much. I know your with us always and I know you will be with john xmas morning. I hope you have a lovely xmas with dad. your mam and dad .and everyone else up there. happy Christmas mam and dad. love and miss yous so much .look after mam up there dad .love yous always ❤💙xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

well grandma, this time last year we were saying our final goodbyes to you💔it breaks my heart more and more each day knowing I can’t see you again, hear your voice, seeing your cheeky little smile, what I would do to see and hear all that again😩! I can’t get over how it’s being one whole year since we have all seen you and it never gets easier. I know you will be rocking it up there and for sure being the boss as always! Sleep tight grandma Jean I love you so much xxxxx

This time lastyear mam was the final night istayed with you .john ,me ,lynne,joanne all stayed in the sittingroom with you .All the family had came to see you and spent hours with you .It was your lastnight sleeping in your home of 58 years the home of happiness and saddness .Bringing all your children up .I think you would of been happy for coming home one last time .Ayear tommorrow we had to say goodbye .second hardest day of my life first one was the day the angels came for you and second your furneral .Ilike to think we did you proud we arranged everything you had asked for .Even tho of the covid restrictions ithink you would of been pleased of how we arranged things .Tomorrow ill be thinking of that horrible day all day .Icarnt believe how fast this year has gone .We visit you and dad everyday if not at work and we have your and dad resting place beautiful .Its not getting any easier mam .its nearly xmas and its just not the same .lifes not the same .The day you passed away our life changed for ever .Will never ever be the same .You know one day it will happen but you never prepare yourself and to be honest you try not to think or prepare yourself .Even tho you had been ill afew years you always seem to pick up you were so strong .You kept going you wernt ready to leave us .But there was only so much you could take and your little body couldnt take anymore .imissing you more and more every day mam .ill never ever get over losing you .my best friend .my beautiful perfect mam .ilove you with all my heart mam .❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Well mam .its 26-11-2021 .A year today when all our lifes changed and never been the same. The day you gained your angel wings .ilost my mam, my best friend ,connor chloe elise lost their grandma and who was their second mam and my grandchildren lost their great grandma .andy lost his mother in law and becca and danny lost their grandma in law .our lifes just havnt been the same The hole family lifes havnt been the same .Theres this huge hole that can never be filled .its just not getting any easier .i carnt believe i havnt seen you for a year .moved your fringe from your eyes .kissed your head three times said ilove you .cut your nails.yes ieven miss cutting your nails .and all the other things idid for you.imiss you telling me off for been abroad geordie .out of all my family your the most geordie you would say .imiss every single thing about you.isit and look through your photos and watch your videos .ilove seeing your face and listening to your voice .miss you telling me to get a pkt of marmite crisps or a fudge or twix .iwish icould hear you saying that again . This year sine you left Harry been born who you would love ,special birthdays chloe passing her driving test ,katelyns wedding .chloe moving into her home and getting a new job. And you not been here to share it with was so hard .but iknow you be here in spirit .lifes just not the same mam .iknow life goes on but its hard .and iknow you want us to get on with life .we just miss you so much .Ayear today our lifes changed for ever .Iknow your always watching us and your with dad now .telling him off what ihear .your out of pain which is a huge comfort. Todays gona be a hard day but as you would want the familys gona be together as you were worried we would drift apart .we are looking after john like we promised .and always will ilove you so so much mam and miss you always .love you always in my heart and mind love anne xxxxxxxxxxxxxx❤❤❤

Well mam .today is a hard day for us. This time a year ago was was the day our life changed for ever. Today was the day we started grieving for you even though you were still here. I'll never ever forget those doctors words and the feeling inside when she said you were very ill and had weeks or months left. My legs went like jelly went in shock and cried. I had to walk back into you and John and pretend we were talking about your neighbours. How I managed to do that I never know but all I could think of is we had to act normal for you. We had to protect you. From that day my heart broke. I can remember thinking I've got to spent every minute I can with you I didn't want to leave you. I made the most of the cuddles I give you when we were getting you dressed. Stroking your arm. Connor and Becca told you you were going to be a great grandma again and if a boy was still going to be Harry. Chloe got to tell you she got her house. The next four weeks were very hard but we treasured the time we had with you. You still told us off. You still were nosey haha. But you were amazing and still worried about us all even though you were very ill. Four weeks time will be a year since you went to be with dad. Life's still no easier we still miss you so so much. I can't believe it's nearly a year since I spoke to you. Only thing that gives me comfort is you're not in pain anymore. I love you so much mam. Miss you. Miss our chats, our moans, I miss every single thing about you. You are always in my heart, and mind. Love you always xxxxxxxxxxxx❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Happy heavenly first birthday mam. first birthday up in heaven. It's awful not coming to see you with your presents. I'm so pleased we had the surprise party for you last year. who would of thought it would of been your last with us. I hope you have a lovely day with dad up there. I miss you so much mam. I love you always in my mind .❤❤❤❤❤❤xxxxxxxx

Well mam what a week its been .you got your little harry .born 21 june .hes beautiful .when hes older we will tell why hes called harry .hes the double of connor .hes had a rough week .been in hostpital for nearly aweek .wasnt well at all but hes on the mend. And jorgie is beautiful .shes so funny and loving .shes been great with harry .her little life has changed in the past week. But shes just took it in her stride .its been hard on them all .then danny had covid so they had to isolate so never seen chloe that was hard .it was elise birthday had a party in garden .weather for awful . This is what I miss me coming to yous and telling you all whats going on . I missed you so much on my birthday .everyone tried to make it special for me but was so hard you not been here .I got a lovely card as if it was from you and two beautiful necklaces with your picture in .was a hard day .missed you telling me all about your labour with me .god mam your such a big big miss .hopefully your stone will be on in next couple of weeks then we can have yours and dads resting place beautiful you deserve the best .that will be hard seeing your name on their .its been 7months .cant believe how fast its going .cant believe I havent seen you .I seen you every day. its getting no easier .I sit and watch your videos .I love listening to you voice .I was watching one the other day when you were watching olly dancing .it was lovely seeing you laughing .I miss that so much .your always on my mind .I miss our chats so much .I love you mam so so much ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Mam I miss you so much. You were my best friend. The house isn't the same without you. I look at the times and think id be asking mam what she wants for tea. Or when I'm in the garden I think of when you would shout for me to come in to lift you up. Iknow I used to moan abit but I would love it to be like that again. I know you visit me ifeel you rubbing my head. My life isn't the same now but I know your not in pain. I love you mam xxxxxxxxx