It's been another year, it's been so difficult...I hate it Mum, I hate that you aren't here.
I wake up every day and for a split second I forget and I think how I am going to phone you but then it hits me again and I feel like I am grieving all over again from day 1.
I want to tell you how much I miss Nicky and ask you why we've gone through so much pain, I know you would hold me and tell me it will be OK but I know you would be feeling as bad as I do, just like you did when Francis died.
Mum you always said this must be hell because of all the pain and heartache, so anything else has got to be better....I know you are in a better place but I miss you so much every day.
Mum you said Nanny would be watching over Francis temporarily, I know you are all together and I know you send your love to our hearts still.
Mum I love you, I miss you and it doesn't get easier does it xxxx
Pauline
04/03/2023