There’s so much more I want to say. It’s 3.08am and I’m at grans, wide awake mum thinking of you. At around 3am for the last few months you used to wake up and ask for a jam butty and a cup of tea or Victoria sponge cake.
I wish we were back there. I want all that time back again and more.
I can’t wait until I can sit with you again in that room….i know it’s just your body and it’s not the same but I want to see you again, I want to hold your hand again. I need you mum. I really really need you.
I’ve never felt pain like this before, all the arguments we had over the years in these last months were finally healed and now I just want you back.
Just days before you went we were there singing and dancing. I want to do that again.
If I’d known when I gave you your dinner the night before you left us I’d have cooked something amazing for you. It’s kind of funny really that your last meal was such a simple one, something you chose and for the first time in ages I didn’t make it.
We were supposed to have sea bass but that ended up in the bin.
Gosh there’s so much more I need to say to you, so many things I want to tell you and I can’t anymore and it hurts so so much.
I’d give anything to have you back mum. I’m desperate. Please mum. I love you so so much.
You were so pure mum, so loved and so kind….im going to miss you forever.
Xxxxxx Rachelle xxxxxxx
Rachelle Whalley
18/04/2026
