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What to do if you can’t attend a funeral?

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Published 23/11/2020
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by Lewis Saunderson
If you can’t attend a funeral it can be difficult for you and the family of the deceased. Try not to feel guilty if you can’t attend, everyone has commitments or circumstances they can’t get out of. During the ongoing Covid-19 pandemic many of you might not be able to attend someone's funeral due to the government restrictions. Whatever the reason maybe in this blog we’ll show they are other ways you can express your condolences and sympathy.

Send a Sympathy Card

A simple but effective way of showing you care is sending a sympathy card. When you send the card, explain you can’t attend the funeral but you don’t need to list excuses. Just express your condolences. It doesn’t need to be long, keep it short and sweet. If you know you can commit to another time to see the family write that in the card.

Send Flowers

Sending flowers is how a lot of people show their sympathy and care. They are universally accepted as being thoughtful and paying tribute to someone’s life. You could send flowers to the funeral if they are being accepted or to the home of the deceased’s family.

Making a Donation

Making a donation can be a great alternative if you don’t want to send flowers or buy a gift. If you would like to send a gift here’s our blog on what you could get them (link for scheduled blog for ‘what do you buy for someone who lost a loved one). Many funerals have ‘donations if desired’ so if you can’t attend a funeral a donation is a great way of helping a cause close to the person deceased and also has a positive impact on the world. It’s especially a perfect way to show your care if the deceased was known to be a charitable person.

To learn more about our own online donation service, check out this article in our Help section.

Send Food

A lovely meal can make anyone feel better and everybody loves food. Bringing a scrumptious meal to someone grieving will touch their hearts. A simple task like making food can be extremely difficult when grieving the loss of a loved one so this will be a perfect way to express your condolences if you can’t attend a funeral. You could either make a homemade meal, pick up something from a shop or even get them a takeaway you know they like.

Paying a Visit

One of the best ways to show you care is to visit the family grieving. The day of the funeral you could be tied up with other commitments but if you know you’ll be free another time, go see them and show your sympathy and support. It won’t matter if it can’t be often, they will appreciate it. If you live far away, try and make the effort still, it goes a long way. You could also video chat, ring them and message them as well.

Live Streaming a Funeral

It is becoming increasingly popular (especially during Covid-19 times) to live stream a funeral. A live stream is broadcasting the funeral via video link over the internet so people who can’t attend a funeral can still see it. Click here to find out more about it.

We hope this blog helps you think of some ways you can show your sympathy, care and condolences if you can’t attend a funeral. If you have many other questions surrounding funeral topics check out our blogs here.

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